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9 years ago
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I wish I was RIDING...
Something's Gotta Give
We are thankful for good results from my oldest step-daughter's MRI last week. The test results were completely normal! Praise God! The neurologist elected to do a spinal tap to test the pressure in the spinal fluid and confirmed a diagnosis of "pseudotumor cerebri". At least this is treatable with medication and gives us hope that she can still keep her sight! Thank you Lord!
I wish she was as thankful for it as we are. It seems no matter what she is given or blessed with, she fails to see how much worse it could have been. She has a follow-up appt with the neurologist in a few weeks and decided to stay in the area rather than go back to the biological father's house where she has been living. That's okay for now, considering the gas prices, but she has elected to stay shacked up with her 16 year-old boyfriend about an hour from us. "Boy Blunder", as my husband calls him, is living with his older brother and girlfriend and their baby in a one-bedroom apartment! Now my step-daughter is in the middle of this mess. She has been there for almost 2 weeks now and says she is going to stay there for the next 3 weeks until her appointment with the neurologist. Did I mention only the older brother has a job? That's right, so the step-daughter and "Boy Blunder" are making absolutely no contributions to the household.
My husband and I decided that we have to intervene before she ends up pregnant or worse. We talked last night about our options. Her car was purchased for her to have "dependable transportion for college". Now that she is not going to school, we have decided it is time for her to get a job and take over payments. If she decides she doesn't want to do that, then it is only right that we take the car back. You see, my hubby is the owner on the title, the ex-wife is the co-buyer and makes the payments right now. Some life lessons are learned the hard way. The car was not purchased for her and "Boy Blunder" to drive around.
We have offered many times for her to come and stay with us until she goes back to the biological dad's house. She has her own room here and would be guaranteed to eat everyday! She will be 19 on March 30th. So, yes, she would be expected to pick up after herself instead of laying around the house all day. She says she doesn't want rules and doesn't like to make plans, because something always ruins them. She has a twisted view of what life is going to be like! There are rules in your job, laws to follow, deadlines to keep! It is time to make some plans on what you want to do the rest of your life. The free-loading has to stop!
As soon as the two of us have a day off together, it looks like we will be making a surprise visit to that apartment for a little "heart to heart". For now, we can only pray that God will open her eyes to the future she is headed for and give her the courage to swallow her pride and make some changes!
I wish she was as thankful for it as we are. It seems no matter what she is given or blessed with, she fails to see how much worse it could have been. She has a follow-up appt with the neurologist in a few weeks and decided to stay in the area rather than go back to the biological father's house where she has been living. That's okay for now, considering the gas prices, but she has elected to stay shacked up with her 16 year-old boyfriend about an hour from us. "Boy Blunder", as my husband calls him, is living with his older brother and girlfriend and their baby in a one-bedroom apartment! Now my step-daughter is in the middle of this mess. She has been there for almost 2 weeks now and says she is going to stay there for the next 3 weeks until her appointment with the neurologist. Did I mention only the older brother has a job? That's right, so the step-daughter and "Boy Blunder" are making absolutely no contributions to the household.
My husband and I decided that we have to intervene before she ends up pregnant or worse. We talked last night about our options. Her car was purchased for her to have "dependable transportion for college". Now that she is not going to school, we have decided it is time for her to get a job and take over payments. If she decides she doesn't want to do that, then it is only right that we take the car back. You see, my hubby is the owner on the title, the ex-wife is the co-buyer and makes the payments right now. Some life lessons are learned the hard way. The car was not purchased for her and "Boy Blunder" to drive around.
We have offered many times for her to come and stay with us until she goes back to the biological dad's house. She has her own room here and would be guaranteed to eat everyday! She will be 19 on March 30th. So, yes, she would be expected to pick up after herself instead of laying around the house all day. She says she doesn't want rules and doesn't like to make plans, because something always ruins them. She has a twisted view of what life is going to be like! There are rules in your job, laws to follow, deadlines to keep! It is time to make some plans on what you want to do the rest of your life. The free-loading has to stop!
As soon as the two of us have a day off together, it looks like we will be making a surprise visit to that apartment for a little "heart to heart". For now, we can only pray that God will open her eyes to the future she is headed for and give her the courage to swallow her pride and make some changes!
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Speed Stepmommin'
I found this list on a website: http://www.karongoodman.com/ssm.html
Had to share it! In honor of all you step-moms out there!
Your quick A-Z tip sheet to run you through the basics of stepmommin' -- enjoy!
Accept what you can't change -- today -- and let yourself move on.
Be consistent about who you are. Everything good builds on that.
Change yourself before you try to change someone else.
Develop a thick skin -- you'll need it!
Energize yourself by taking very good care of yourself. That's one of your most important jobs.
Factor lots of fun into your steplife.
Go for your goals, those for your family and those just for yourself, with everything you have.
Hope for the best; cope with the rest.
Investigate before you place blame; everything isn't always how it appears.
Jump in softly, with one foot at a time. Stepfamily relationships are sensitive beings.
Know what you're talking about before you speak.
Love your family as much as you can, every way you can.
Master your thoughts, because they will master you.
Never underestimate your strength.
Open your heart; you'll be amazed what takes hold.
Pray daily -- often hourly!
Question what you don't understand.
Retreat when you need to, alone, to a place of quiet and rest.
Show your integrity in every step-moment, even the difficult ones.
Team up with your husband and run your family together.
Understand that we're all imperfect.
Voice your opinion quietly and you'll have a lot more listeners.
Work hard for the family you want. Nothing worth having is easy.
Xaggerate your gratitude to those who are kind to you.
Yell for help when you need it. You don't have to handle everything alone.
Zero in on one problem at a time; that's always enough.
Had to share it! In honor of all you step-moms out there!
Your quick A-Z tip sheet to run you through the basics of stepmommin' -- enjoy!
Accept what you can't change -- today -- and let yourself move on.
Be consistent about who you are. Everything good builds on that.
Change yourself before you try to change someone else.
Develop a thick skin -- you'll need it!
Energize yourself by taking very good care of yourself. That's one of your most important jobs.
Factor lots of fun into your steplife.
Go for your goals, those for your family and those just for yourself, with everything you have.
Hope for the best; cope with the rest.
Investigate before you place blame; everything isn't always how it appears.
Jump in softly, with one foot at a time. Stepfamily relationships are sensitive beings.
Know what you're talking about before you speak.
Love your family as much as you can, every way you can.
Master your thoughts, because they will master you.
Never underestimate your strength.
Open your heart; you'll be amazed what takes hold.
Pray daily -- often hourly!
Question what you don't understand.
Retreat when you need to, alone, to a place of quiet and rest.
Show your integrity in every step-moment, even the difficult ones.
Team up with your husband and run your family together.
Understand that we're all imperfect.
Voice your opinion quietly and you'll have a lot more listeners.
Work hard for the family you want. Nothing worth having is easy.
Xaggerate your gratitude to those who are kind to you.
Yell for help when you need it. You don't have to handle everything alone.
Zero in on one problem at a time; that's always enough.
Monday, March 17, 2008
And so are the "Days of Our Lives"
My step-daughter is "in the area" for 2 weeks. We have more issues than we can shake a stick at! She is having an MRI tomorrow to explore reasons for some swelling to the optic nerve behind the right eye. They discovered it last week during a routine eye doctor visit. I am sure she is scared by what it "could be". We are all trying to support her and let her know we are here no matter what, but she still pushes everyone away. Yet we all continue to work together: making her appointments, phone calls, and dealing with insurance issues since she will be 19 on March 30th. No more insurance coverage for her after that.
Her mom, her dad & I, the biological father & his wife... All people who love her and continue to try and put our differences aside to take care of health issues and intense responsibilities for her well being. When it benefits her, she reminds us of the fact that she "is an adult" now. Yet when we try to get her to take care of the responsibilities on her own, she says, "quit throwing it in my face that I am an adult!" Unbelievable!
Surely we can all agree that if she is not going to work to get the college education we agreed to pay for, then it is time to...
GET A JOB!
PAY YOUR OWN BILLS!
MAKE YOUR OWN APPOINTMENTS!
AND TREAT PEOPLE THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED!
Okay, Okay,
I feel much better.....
Her mom, her dad & I, the biological father & his wife... All people who love her and continue to try and put our differences aside to take care of health issues and intense responsibilities for her well being. When it benefits her, she reminds us of the fact that she "is an adult" now. Yet when we try to get her to take care of the responsibilities on her own, she says, "quit throwing it in my face that I am an adult!" Unbelievable!
Surely we can all agree that if she is not going to work to get the college education we agreed to pay for, then it is time to...
GET A JOB!
PAY YOUR OWN BILLS!
MAKE YOUR OWN APPOINTMENTS!
AND TREAT PEOPLE THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED!
Okay, Okay,
I feel much better.....
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Autism Awareness Month
I haven't posted an entry in a while. As usual, things have been kinda hectic! My hubby had some training in the Dallas area for work this week, and I was blessed to have days off to go with him!
The highlight of the trip was getting to see my awesome best friend! We have been friends since the 1st grade! She is a wonderful person, caring friend, and amazing mother to her 2 children. Her son has autism and she has sure been a trooper getting him the help and education that he deserves! I want to encourage everyone: If you don't know much about autism, please educate yourselves, research it and get to know someone who has been diagnosed with the disease! April is Autism Awareness Month, so please do your part in finding out more information before judging the kids or the parents dealing with the effects of autism.
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